“We are not all the same”

Three bereaved siblings attend the same school but are behaving in very different ways following the death.


  • The siblings are demonstrating their individual responses to the death, as each will have had their own unique relationship with the person who died.
  • At different developmental stages, their grief will also reflect their understanding and individual personalities.
  • Grief elicits a range of emotions and behaviours, and everyone grieves in their own way.

What might help:

  • Each pupil needs reassurance and to have their grief acknowledged, no matter how they are presenting at school.
  • It is important that staff do not make assumptions about a ‘right’ way to grieve.
  • Talk to the bereaved pupils about ways of managing their feelings, particularly where there are behaviours that could be detrimental to themselves or others (e.g. angry and picking fights in the playground).